By Shmuel Ross

Welcome to our place— Bellevue
The "funny farm" for some
Forget the rest— this is the best—
And the best is yet to come.

Deck the halls with padded walls
Which match any decor
All the guests get special vests
With long sleeves— all the more.

Everyone has so much fun
It's such a joy to see
Just walk this way— here's where you'll stay
In room 6203.

Here's your roommate Mr. Slate
He is manic-depressive
Stop worrying— fear not a thing
For right now he's regressive.

Right down the hall you'll find Miss Ball
You'll also find Miss Frenic
And Sue and Ann and Hattie Fran
As she is schizophrenic.

And over here you'll find Mitch Deer
Who thinks he's apple cider
And right across you'll find S. Ross
Who thinks that he's a writer.

Now, just next door— 6204
You'll find your neighbor Jack
For lost items go straight to him
Our kleptomaniac.

We'd like to say "Enjoy your stay"
"Enjoy it here at Bellevue"
If you improve tell us the news
And we'll be sure to bill you.

Copyright 1989 by Shmuel Ross. All Rights Reserved.